White House press corps addressed

The Media Report on ABC Radio National this morning reprised part of Stephen Colbert’s address at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner back in April. Very amusing, and always well worth another look.

As excited as I am to be here with the President, I am appalled to be surrounded by the liberal media that is destroying America. With the exception of Fox News.

Fox News gives you both sides of every story: the President’s side and the Vice President’s side.

But the rest of you, what are you thinking? Reporting on NSA wire-tapping or secret prisons in Eastern Europe? Those things are secret for a very important reason; they’re super-depressing. And if that’s your goal, well, misery accomplished.

Over the last five years you people were so good over tax cuts, WMD intelligence, the effect of global warming. We Americans didn’t want to know, and you had the courtesy not to try to find out. Those were good times – as far as we know.

But listen, let’s review the rules. Here’s how it works: The President makes decisions, he’s the decider, the press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down: Make, Announce, Type.

Just put them through a spellcheck and go home. Get to know your family again. Make love to your wife. Write that novel you’ve got kicking around in your head. You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the Administration? You know, fiction.

Colbert’s full routine is available in transcript here, or audio here.