Friday, March 05, 2010

What the ’k’n’ell’s been happening with Knut?

Knut, the polar bear born in captivity at the Berlin zoo in December 2006, is in the news again.

The evil Left, having failed to have him assassinated when he was a newborn cub, now wants to have him castrated, apparently to forestall the consequences of Knut’s canoodling with a female bear who’s his near cousin.

It’s certainly been a roller coaster ride for the poor little Knut in his short life to date. As well as being constantly and mercilessly anthropomorphised, he’s been threatened with death, suffered personality disorders from unrestrained adulation, and been criticised for not being as cute as when he was a baby.

With this latest threat, Knut faces the prospect of knowing he’s somewhat less than the bear he used to be.

And of never knowing the joys of fatherhood (which, for polar bears, sometimes involves slaughtering and cannibalising defenceless bear cubs; but let’s not go there).

How much can a polar bear?

’K’n’oath, there’s only so much!!

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12 Comments:

Blogger Kathy Farrelly said...

Now they wanna cut off Knut's nuts?
Unf***'n believable JARCOB!

6/3/10 8:07 PM  
Anonymous Harry Heidelberg said...

That's right Kathy. The left had it in for this bear from the moment he was born.

9/3/10 12:54 AM  
Anonymous Jacob said...

Nice one Kath! A better heading for this post might have been: "Death knell for Knut's nuts"

Sure Harry, I wouldn't be surprised if the Left wanted him dead because he was living proof polar bears could thrive, indeed flourish, in sub-polar conditions. Thus, why worry about global warming, eh? Or something. Nope, wouldn't be surprised at all.

I mean, I just made that up, but it has a certain troothiness which someone like Tim Blair could use to hilarious effect.

9/3/10 9:18 PM  
Anonymous harry Heidelberg said...

has anyone read tim blair since he went to the main stream media?

10/3/10 6:39 AM  
Anonymous Harry Heidelberg said...

Oh and I am not joking re the left. Go back and research the archives and you will find indeed it was the left who called for the murder of dear little Knut.

10/3/10 6:41 AM  
Blogger Father Park said...

Knut is the bastard son of Bundy - after a night on the eponymous spirit.

Yet another bloody polar bear has been allowed live to spruik alcohol to impressionable young'uns.

Removing Knut's nuts is the only way to stop this line of rum besotted bears.

10/3/10 3:41 PM  
Anonymous Jacob said...

One of the last times I looked in at Blair's, he was gloating over Toyota's mass-recall of the Prius, whenever that was. He seemed to think it spelt the end of hybrid auto technology.

As Toyota also mass-recalled some fossil-fuelled models, I went back to suggest maybe this spelt the end of internal combustion.

But I couldn't find the post! Who knows, maybe he had to pull it because Toyota threatened to cancel advertising; but I couldn't be bothered checking.

"you will find indeed it was the left who called for the murder of dear little Knut"

Yeah I think it was the same PETA guy who's now talking about de-nutting the bear. He seems to actually enjoy the notoriety and getting all the anthropomorphisers up in arms about dear little Knut.

As it turns out, he was right in a way about euthanasing (aka, murdering) Knut, because the poor, dear little fellow is now a psychological basketcase who lives at the whim of his human keepers and a fickle public.

11/3/10 9:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

..dear little fellow is now a psychological basketcase who lives at the whim of his human keepers and a fickle public.

I know how he feels...

Think I'll go and cut me knuts knoff.

j

12/3/10 10:29 AM  
Blogger Caz said...

Harry - I read a short post on Tim Blair's site only today, for the first time in, oooooh, an age.

Only read it because another article linked to it. I had quite forgotten about Blair.

He seems to have built up the usual "me too" following again, which must have taken a while. It wasn't the smartest of most elegant blog move, but he isn't a journalist, so 'going commercial' wasn't a change: he was always commercial.

20/3/10 9:37 PM  
Anonymous Jacob said...

Oh yeah indeed, always commercial.

Sweet are the uses of adsense.

But at least adsense doesn't make you have to pull posts.

(If indeed that's what happened, which I couldn't give a stuff about anyway.)

20/3/10 11:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny that Jacob. I have only made one post ever on the TB (sounds like a disease) blog.

It was not abusive or anything, creative in fact; but the moderator did get nack to me to say it was far toooo long.

Funny that I replied it was only one word longer than an earlier post that TB had no problems with publishing.

Oh well so much for free speech in TB world.

At least they had the courtsy to reply and make a bullshit excuse - I always knew TB would take offence at my satirical (poignant) post.

I then inquired about TB's views on censorship, I don't expect a reply.

j

24/3/10 4:29 PM  
Anonymous Jacob said...

Apart from that mentioned above, I haven't had any real inclination to comment there; because unless you're 'on message' in blair's little groupthink scene, you're not going to get much of a go there -- as it seems you've found, Justin.

From what I've seen anyway, Blair seems to have transplanted his old blog with immense success to the news.com portal. All the elements are there, much the same old crowd, same censorship through groupthink and uneven 'moderation', etc.

Blair and Rupert have been staggeringly good for each other and undoubtedly are both laughing all the way to the bank.

24/3/10 9:57 PM  

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